Leadership and TRUST

"Everything moves at the speed of trust."
— Stephen Covey

It’s funny how we only notice something’s importance when it’s gone. Trust is like oxygen: we hardly ever notice it until it starts to run out. I've been thinking about the teams I’ve worked with—the ones where things just seemed to click. There was this underlying current of trust, a kind of unspoken understanding that made everything smoother. It’s almost like there’s a hum beneath the surface, and when it’s there, everything feels a little lighter.

Trust is the lifeblood of all relationships. A living current that connects us in ways we don’t always see. When it's present, everything seems to move a little more easily. But when it’s missing? Things grind to a halt. Leadership in the church is no different. And it’s harder than ever to talk about leadership without also acknowledging the deep, complicated relationship we have with trust.

So, what is trust? It’s simple, right? Trust is believing in the reliability or ability of someone or something. But let’s dig a little deeper. Trust is what lets us go about our day without questioning everything. We trust that the chair we sit in won’t collapse, that the traffic light will turn green, and that our phone will work when we need it. These small acts of trust keep life moving.

But trust in people? That’s another story. Trust in people is complicated. When it’s broken, it has a way of making us question everything. We’ve all been there, right? That time someone we trusted let us down—sometimes in the smallest ways, and sometimes in the most painful. Once trust is broken, we don’t just feel it in that moment; it echoes. It lingers.

And here’s the thing: trust isn’t just a nice-to-have in leadership—it’s essential. But in a world where trust has been shattered so many times, it’s tough to figure out how to build it back up. People come into our churches with histories of broken trust, with trauma, and wounds. And we, as leaders, are often carrying those same scars. We’ve all been burned. We’ve all had moments where we’ve been let down. And often, we end up projecting those old wounds onto people who have nothing to do with them.

That’s the tricky part. Leadership in the church isn’t just about building trust from the ground up. It’s about repairingtrust, navigating it, and relearning it. Every time we step into a leadership role, we’re asked to re-earn people’s trust. It doesn’t happen automatically. Trust is fragile. Once it’s earned, it’s something we need to hold carefully, tenderly.

Growing in Trust and Trustworthiness

Trust is a skill—a muscle. We have to work at it. It’s not just about having honest conversations (though those are essential). It’s about cultivating the ability to trust and be trustworthy, which means leaning into the mess of it all.

1. Have Honest Conversations
   Trust can’t grow where silence reigns. When things go unsaid—when we avoid the uncomfortable truths—trust starts to wither. It’s not about being brutal; it’s about being real. Can you speak openly about what’s on your heart? Can you listen without defensiveness? These conversations will be awkward, even painful, but they’re necessary.

2. Practice Forgiveness
   Trust is tied to vulnerability. And vulnerability? Well, it’s risky. But it’s the only way forward. Forgiveness doesn’t mean pretending that nothing happened—it means choosing to not hold someone’s failure over them. It’s not easy. But without forgiveness, trust doesn’t have room to grow.

3. Seek Healing
   When trust is broken, there’s a wound. Leadership isn’t about pretending the wound doesn’t exist—it’s about seeking healing. Whether through counseling, prayer, or hard conversations, healing is essential. It doesn’t happen overnight, but without it, we risk leading from brokenness instead of wholeness.

4. Risk Again
   After enough hurt, it’s tempting to build walls around your heart. But that’s no way to lead. To lead is to risk. It’s about choosing to trust again, even when it feels safer to hold back. Trust is risky, yes, but it’s the risk that leads to growth and freedom.

Trust Needs to Flow in All Directions

Trust isn’t a static thing—it needs to flow.

• Trust Needs to Flow to Us
  It’s hard to lead when you don’t feel trusted. But trust isn’t just handed over; it’s earned. If you’re not feeling trusted, it might be time for a real conversation with those who lead you. Trust takes time, but it takes work.

• Trust Needs to Flow From Us
  Trust is a two-way street. To lead, we have to be willing to trust others. It’s not about being naïve, it’s about choosing to believe that people can rise to the occasion. You can’t foster trust if you’re always suspicious.

• Trust Needs to Flow Around Us
  As leaders, it’s our responsibility to create an environment where trust can thrive. That means pushing back against cynicism and fostering a culture of openness. People need to feel like they can be vulnerable without fear of rejection.

Trust: A Tool Every Leader Can Use

I don’t care what your strengths are—whether you’re relational, visionary, strategic, or executional—everyone can build trust. It’s not about what you do; it’s about who you are when you do it. The best leaders aren’t necessarily the loudest or the most charismatic; they’re the ones who get that everything moves at the speed of trust.

How Do We Trust When There’s a Gap?

Gaps are inevitable. They’re part of leadership. But in every gap—whether in understanding, motive, or information—we have a choice. We can fill that gap with suspicion and cynicism, or we can choose to fill it with faith. This is where faith gets real. Trust isn’t just about believing the right things—it’s about choosing trust in the face of uncertainty.

Trust is a risk. But it’s a risk that leads to freedom, growth, and beauty. Trust doesn’t always make things easier. But it makes things possible.